Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Life as I know it is changing, always.

I find myself stuck sometimes, being upset with the way things pan out in my life. I am a creator. I am the one who sets things in motion and attracts things to me. Sometimes I am just super frustrated with how it all goes! I have a tendency to want to plan everything. I want to know what is going to happen or be prepared if things do happen. I can't even watch horror or suspense movies anymore because it hurts all fibers of my being to not know!

I have been practicing accepting what is the last couple weeks. It is against the grain in my brain to let stuff just float past me. Though I have been doing it! I am just trying to keep my eye on the prize and keep going. Being a chick I naturally have my brain connecting a lot of different thoughts at once. This "practicing" is like I am cutting my thought pattern "tentacles". Is this for the better? We will see. I am a lot happier lately and I am getting a lot done on my list of "what I want in my life". So this is a good thing.
I find one huge catch to "accepting what is", I don't know where to put my anxiety/anger/insecurity/irritability energy. I know it doesn't work when I stuff it down because that is just like setting a timer for melt down.

Things I have been doing to release my crazy energy:

• Yelling in the car (without children and the car is stopped)
Sounds kind of crazy? Well it is. This usually happens when I am feeling my throat chakra getting all swollen/closed up. It is a similar felling to wanting to cry. Very effective carnal screaming is therapeutic for me and as long as I roll down the windows to let out the thick cloud of "crazy" after, it serves me.

• Running/walking
I find this is a slow yet efficient way to ooze my crazy out and breath some clarity back in.

• Listening to Punk Rock (especially efficient if windows are down while driving)
I think this is my favorite because I can be super angry or super happy listening to the same music. I have actually found more delight in this then I thought. Before I know it, I forget why I was so tight and crazy. Everything is going to be fine.

• Cooking/baking
There is nothing better to shove in the "unexpected's" face then some awesome aesthetic tasty creation that everyone wants a part of.

On a good note I feel like I am more open to off the cuff decisions; like going to go see my grandparents with the kids or taking a drive through the canyon at dusk.

At Great Grandma and Grandpa Breinholt's swing set:


Clover snoozing



Grandpa Wally showed us up



Penelope a natural



Keltons First knee hang!



Me being "One with what is"



Love,
Mimi

Friday, July 9, 2010

Music and Hope for Humanity.


Kelton with is Rootbeer



Kelton and I enjoying the band



Penelope and piglet playing with someones crazy neon orange glitter nails



Last night I had a ball with my kids.
Salt Lake City does a thing called the Twilight Concert Series. Pretty much it is a free concert/show in the park every Thursday for a couple of months in the summer. It is great because it is ALL ages and usually very relaxed. Last night they had the first concert of the season in Pioneer Park downtown. It happened to be one of my favorite bands, Modest Mouse, so I was excited to go. John and decided to bring the kids because we have had such success bringing them in the past. Our game plan was to have John save us a spot in the park right after work and I was going to meet up with him after grabbing the children. Due to previous experiences, we both parked at Trax stations and took the train down.
Kelton has never been on a train and he LOVED it. It was like his "awesome meter" went up after feeling secure in the train and letting go of gripping the side bar. I wonder why I haven't taken him on it before! Penelope hung in the baby sling the whole travels and I got to try all the cool sitting/laying positions with her.

On a side note, I would recommend the Balboa baby sling to everyone with a baby or small toddler! (I have breast feed and made lasagna at the same time before with this thing. Is that possible to do and sanitary? I say yes!... If you have mad skills. Ask Kristin, she is my witness)

ANYWAY... After the VERY full train, our little troop walked a couple of blocks to the park and saw the 6 block long line. IT WAS PACKED!! They say 40,000 people showed up. I tried not to get discouraged because I had a call from John confirming an awesome spot with blanket and water bottles waiting for us on the inside. After that some nice high school kids adopted me in line and from that point on it was like the Utah public welcomed me with open arms. John's cousin Randy showed up and carried my bag in for me and looked for john while I chilled with the kids (he is SUPER tall). To no avail, John was MIA and not answering his phone. I am pretty sure there was not enough cell towers around to handle all the phone traffic. Since I couldn't get a hold of John to FIND him, Kelton, Penelope and I just did our own thing.

List of nice stuff I noticed people do:
1. If people were smoking, they would back up like 25 feet from me when they saw I had kids.
2. Getting through a concert crowd can be rough and rude, it is like roller derby minus the skates. When people saw I had a baby, it was like parting the Red Sea. I would have semi-intoxicated people yelling at their friends to, "Freakin' move Bro, we have a baby coming through!"
3. When all was lost in finding John and our blanket, I asked to sit with a family who was set up right next to us. Then I realized it was a whole group of parents and kids and we were welcomed with open arms.
4. I remembered snacks for the kids but John had the water bottles. Before I knew it, Kelton was set up with a Rootbeer and I didn't even have to leave the blanket! (the guy wouldn't even let me pay for it)
5. People were so nice to my kids. I think Penelope is super cute and Kelton is cool and has good manors, I am also a bias mother. Apparently the general public are crazy about my children too. There were an abundance of people/children who talked or played with my little ones.
6. On the Train we always had a seat no matter how packed. Though there were 100's of people piling on, fellow concert goers were courteous and sweet in letting us get passed them and getting on the train.
7. Before she got off of the train, a really nice stranger made a note to tell me "You have beautiful wonderful children and you're a beautiful mother." After a long night of kid carting, husband looking, people dodging, it made my insides feel squishy sweet.

Another side note: My iPhone is an awesome tool. I use it all day for business, art communication, etc. One thing I didn't realize that was so useful for is, entertaining children. Penelope's favorite App is "Toddler Colors". The rules are, if you try and put it in your mouth, the phone gets taken away. Kelton's favorite is "Fruit Ninja". The rules are, if you drop it, the phone gets taken away. I know it is a risk letting my kids play with MY toys but it pays off when I am waiting in line to pay a fine or we're on the train at 10pm on a Thursday night.


All in all it was an excellent night. Kelton got his own pizza for dinner, because that is what ninja turtles eat. And I got to dance and see one of my favorite bands play. Modest Mouse was a great first concert for Penelope, she even danced herself. (back wiggling on a blanket is baby dancing, right?) I am not sure if it tops Kelton's first concert (Violent Fems at the U of U) but it is a great place to start.
It has been yet another result showing me I don't have to give up things I love and who I am to be the Mom I want to be.
Thanks for showing up for me last night Humanity, you give me hope.

Love, Mimi

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

More then a lot of time.





It has been a while and a half since I have posted any new blogs. I was talking with my brother Jake last night about how much I love reading about what is going on with my family and he pointed out how I was guilty of not updating for everyone else.
Well, Penelope is about 7 months old now. She is rolling over like crazy and teases us with trying to crawl. She is honing her spoon skills and loving mushed up solid foods once a day.
Kelton just finished his season of teeball (I am not sure if he liked it.) He is doing summer camp with his daycare and loving it. I am trying to help him find something he really likes to do as a hobby (other then video games) and it is up in the air. Maybe swimming lessons next? Sometimes I wish I didn't work so the scheduling stuff during the day wasn't so challenging.
John is host/ushering friends in and out of town. He is going to turn one of the rooms in the basement into a sound room soon and I know he is excited about the project. His goal for this summer is to fish and camp, a lot. I support this fully :)
I am on a kickball league. My team is in the championship, final four. We play tonight and I am excited to see if we can beat the odds and come out on top. I have rejoined for next season. It is a ball making new adult friends. That sums up our family currently.
I am personally still working on losing my baby weight, aligning priorities in my life and TEACHING MY SELF CONTENT COMMUNICATION. I think that last one is the most challenging right now. It is like re-wiring my brain. Well wish me luck!

Oh, John, my brother Pete and I went long boarding the other day and I am super rusty. Yet, I can't stop thinking about going again, that must meant I REALLY enjoyed it.

Waiting to long board again,
Mimi